Cancer is bad for so many things!

Omg why am I so tired? It's only 2 AM.

ahahahahaha. To anyone else that would be a ridiculous statement- to me it's just a normal fact of life.

Today I wrote and mailed some letters. I will tell you more about them next week. For now, suffice it to say that they were good letters and to some very special people whom I had no clue existed just 2 years ago.

Sometimes the days when you laugh the hardest it's because you are hurting the most and you need the almost-manic adrenaline rush of incessant giggling to get you through.

I'm not good with goodbyes. Not at all. I avoid them as if they are the plague... I avoid even the mention of them and only realize what I did 5 hours later.... I miss the fact that Nathan would have noticed, known what I was doing, and told me about it right away. He helped me to be a better person, and now I'm developing weird personality quirks that he didn't know about and I have no one to tell me I'm developing weird personality quirks.

What's a gal to do?

So my cousin called me today and left a message and this is what he said, "Hey! It's Budd... your cousin. I mean, of course it is. Who else is named Budd?"

I laughed quite a bit.

I love my cousins. Every single bloomin' one of them.

and not just because they have access to the most magical of all knit wear

The. beard. hat.

I think that might be the only beard I've ever loved.

Also I looked into joining the "blogher" network. If you know anything evil about them you should let me know, now. Because I don't really see how it could be a bad thing and I've seen several reputable blogs belong to blogher... might be a way to get my blog out to more than just my wonderful friends who are starting to go about their everyday lives again and no longer hang on my every word.

Fools, the lot of them.

And hey, if you are the praying type, could you send one up for dear Kara? She done had a beautiful incredibly darling baby boy who I like to think got to meet Nathan before coming on down here to be named after him. And who has yet to cry either time that I got to hold him, and who finds my voice so normal/soothing that it doesn't wake him up, even when his mom is *trying* to get him to wake up. Sorry distracted... Pray for Kara cause she's been having some infections. Everything right now is ok, just painful, and after having a baby without any drugs, I think that homegirl has probably had enough excessive pain for a while. Plus, obviously it needs to clear up before it does become serious. This whole having babies thing is fraught with so much more peril than I knew!

I think I need to go to the dentist, and I'm dreading it... Cancer was not good for my teeth.