Thursday, December 22, 2011

A steady supply of contradiction

Useta could

This is a phrase that comes from Arkansas... either that or from Southern MO. We do not say "useta could" in Northern, MO. Nope, not at all. We do put things "on top of the refrigerator." Which I think sounds totally normal but I hear tell that it's not actually correct. (By the by we don't actually say "hear tell" or "by the by" in northern MO. I just like to pick up antiquated slang and throw it around like it's normal.) I love dialects... They fascinate me.

In case you were concerned, my ability to generate body heat is still in full force. I went to Silver Dollar City tonight, and while the rest of the family were lamenting their frozen fingers and toes, I was offering my hand heating services.

With great heat retention powers comes great heat sharing responsibilities.

But only to family members. I didn't offer to any one else... though there were some pretty cute guys out... but if they were at SDC at Christmas I feel like there is a far greater chance than normal that they are "with" someone. Too bad, too, because I think I've really got down the whole looking totally adorable/attractive in my winter coat and crocheted hat.

This is why I need a boy in my life. So I can tell him, "I'm cute!" and get an "Oh brother" face while he still agrees with me wholeheartedly.

I crave a steady supply of contradiction in my life. It's good for my soul. And my large head.

Bill, Paula and I did our gift exchange today- I got a cool retro owl necklace, a game, a movie and a video game. Yesssssss.

Told you it was cool.
I find myself more exhausted than I have a right to be. I think the large amount of sugar I've been ingesting this holiday season is to blame... Have there always been this many sweet things around and I just didn't notice or is this a banner year for the Christmas sugar crop?

I'd say I'm not eating any more sugar this season, but I know it's not even close to true... hopefully I don't gain back all the weight I've lost in the past year over the next 2 weeks. That would be annoying.

4 comments:

  1. I'm having trouble with "useta could." I know I must say it, but I can't figure out how or when. Is it "you said I could?"

    ReplyDelete
  2. Usetacould: As in- "He/she/they useta could do the tango but then he/she/they broke their foot." or "It useta could be that kids could walk a mile home from school in the first grade, but that isn't safe anymore."

    I might be using this wrong. It is not my native vernacular. I'm gonna go put something on top of the fridge, now.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I usetacould figure things like that out.

    ReplyDelete
  4. What do they say instead of "on top of the refrigerator?" Do they say "on THE top of the refrigerator?" If so, is the song "On Top of Old Smoky" somehow wrong? Or "On top of the world?" That just seems silly.

    I never heard "ustacould" until Jeff Foxworthy. I privately suspect him of making it up, and all rurally- or southerly-minded people are just playing along to avoid looking like noobs.

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...