"What?" You say.
"Tomato Soup?" You say.
Verily I say unto you.
Tomato Soup.
OK, lemme 'splain before you scoff at me.
But before I 'splain let me give you the beginning of a blog that I wrote this afternoon:
I don't understand it when people say that they get anything that they try for - be it a job/part/accolade/position... That doesn't happen to me...
In fact, sometimes it seems that the surest way for me to not get something is to get excited about it... to try for it... to actively hope for it. It was true in grade school - For example, the role of the Littlest Christmas Tree in "The Littlest Christmas Tree." The teacher even split the part and I still wasn't even a regular tree. Broke my poor little 3rd grade heart. It was true in Jr high. It was true in high school and college and it's still proving to be true. (I decided listing actual examples of all my life's disappointments wasn't very fun/smart. So just imagine that I did, if you like symmetry.)
That said, jobs/parts/accolades/positions do have a tendency to just fall into my lap. It's like there is a strange law of the universe that says if I'm competing against anyone I will lose. *However* if someone is just told, "think of the best person you know for this job" then I'm the top of the list. Perhaps this is why I'm not a competitive person?
Kinda makes me not want to try or hope for things...Actually what I've been thinking lately is that I need to just stop hoping for/wanting stuff... Because I really want what God wants for me.. but I don't know what that is.... and so I thought perhaps what I needed to do was just give it all up... to not hope or want anything.
Ok... I hear you. What in the world does all this have to do with tomato soup?
Well I went to small group tonight... and I have to admit, I went kinda kicking and screaming (in my head.) I didn't want to... in fact I planned not to. I was going to skip it and then a friend called me and asked if I wanted to hang out and I said that I had small group so I couldn't... but then I actually had to go to small group. So I went- begrudgingly. And practically everything that everyone said tonight hit something in me... and they weren't even talking or praying for me at the time... so I finally said that I could use some prayer for all the things in my pre-blog. And the group prayed for me and it was really great... and very teary... but good.
Then I came home to have some supper. I was really excited about tomato soup for some reason.
"At last!" You cry.
"The soup makes an appearance!" You exclaim.
"Stop interrupting me" I frown.
"Sorry, mate." You say.
"S'cool, just don't do it again." I say
So I was...
"Right, Sorry." You say
I glare.
So I was excited for tomato soup. And I came home and I got it ready and I put it in the microwave. I eat the Soup at Hand tomato soups... I'm not sure why but that's what I like. My soup looks like this:
The problem with Soup at Hand is they are taller and skinny-- so as to be handy. But you know how soup jumps in the microwave when you are heating it up? Something to do with hot pockets of the liquid.
Well my tomato soup that I was so excited about... my last tomato soup. It started heating up and then it jumped... and it fell over.
See how that worked-- I got excited and then this thing that I had in my hand, that I was so excited about... it toppled.
So then I had a gigantic mess to clean up, *and* I didn't have the soup.
And yes there are more soups at the store... but I don't like shopping by myself... especially not at night and especially not when there is a tornado warning/watch. So I can get what I want... but it's in a place I am not and it's gonna take some time to get there if I want to be smart about it.
See what I mean? That's the story of why my life is like tomato soup.
It makes you want to either laugh or cry... I choose laughing.
And glaring at you when you get super chatty.
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